Midnight Rx

Aired: 16/12/22 at 6pm

1) A news report on the widespread cancellation of prescription drug plans:

KENT: To cope with the crisis, many consumers are turning to alternative forms of treatment. CHIEF WIGGUM: I've had to medicate Ralphie with stuff from the evidence locker. 

[Wiggum gives Ralph a pill, and his pupils get larger to fill his eye.]

RALPH: I'm cuckoo for contraband!

2) After the senior citizens are no longer given pills:

GRAMPA: I didn't die in World War 2 just to be pushed around by some pill-hoarding hussy! I'm gonna fight this thing!

3) Homer, Grampa, Apu and Flanders are smuggling drugs in Canada:

CANADIAN: Well, circle cut my bacon! Look at all these Yankee-doodly-dandies! Is there another Vietnam going on? 

FLADNERS: Hello, neighborino to the north. I sure like the cut of your gibberish. 

[Flanders and the Canadian rapidly make doodlily and diddily noises.]

CANADIAN: Say, would you like to puff on a reefer-ino? It's legal here. 

FLANDERS: They warned me Satan would be attractive. Let's go!

4) Homer, Grampa, Apu and Flanders are driving to the US border checkpoint:

FLANDERS: Anyone want some coffee for the ride back? 

APU: Not that convenience store crap, is it? Because I don't feed that to my dogs. 

FLANDERS: No, no. It's home-brewed. Careful. It's hotter than a Fox News weather skank.